Friday, January 28, 2011

Why not...worst of 2010

Why not do a worst list?  Since I posted earlier today about my faves in 2010 I might as well post a worst list as well.  Granted, I don't see as many bad movies a year as I used to (some of you will argue against this, but it is the honest to god truth) but I sure saw some stinkers this year.  So let's dig in to the crap that was released in 2010!

These movies are the cream of the crop...of bad.  All three of these movies made me wince and wonder why people gave money to these hacks.  I'm not saying I could do better, but I would know when to have pulled the plug on these disasters.

1. Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief - How do you take a perfectly entertaining book and completely destroy it?  Well first off, change the plot so much that it is almost unrecognizable from the source material, change the settings so the feel of the story is completely lost, and add scenes from future books into this story for no apparent reason.  I really shouldn't be surprised since Chris Columbus has a track record for shit, but this was inexcusable.  The only saving grace was the so-so effects.  NOT looking forward to the next one.

2. Repo Men - A movie about a group of people who retake synthetic organs from their live hosts for non-payment should have been a darkly fun romp.  What was released was a well acted, but poorly edited mess of a film that was about 1:15 too long.  There is a huge difference between character development and useless scenes that have nothing to do with the story whatsoever.  This movie is so boring my wife yelled at it a couple of times.  I suffered through most of the film to see about 25 minutes of good cinema.  Who knew such an interesting story line would be SO boring?!

3. A Nightmare on Elm Street - If you are going to change the story of a classic horror film, it better be for a good reason.  Needless to say, this was NOT a good reason.  Not only that, but poor Rooney Mara was stuck in it.  Thank god she has graduated and will be starring in movies I will hopefully love (The Fincher directed Lisabeth Slander movies).  Boring is all I can say.  There wasn't one ounce of tension built up.  Dear directors of horror movies: Please know you have to come up with more than one way to drive tension in a scene.  You can't just have an actor slowly creep forward while you slowly push up on them with a camera.  It makes your film suck.

4. Tron: Legacy - Few movies made me more angry than this one this year.  Not because is was entirely awful, but because I felt it could have been great in the right hands.  Please don't give this big of a project to someone who has never been in charge of making a full length motion picture before.  It had such promise and seemed to fail at the things it was even doing well at.  Yes, the effects were amazing, but how it was edited made for confusion.  To get away with digital sets, you have to explain the world, not just what's right in front of you.  This movie lacked scope.  The script was far too serious and vague.  It could have been great.  And that's why it made this list.

Other crappers:
5. Burlesque
6. Legion

I'm sure there are a ton of others that should be on this list.  But I didn't see them.  Which is amazing for me.  What ones did you hate?

1 comment:

Minneapolis Mike said...

I didn't see any of your 5 except Burlesque, and yes...it was poo-poo undies bad. Me and my boyfriend at the time were laughing at it for all the wrong reasons. Cher might have been better if she'd have been able to move her face. As for Tron...haven't seen it but a mutual friend (I bet you can guess) positively LURVED it. As for movies I hated...ok it just came out this year but Green Hornet was awful.

--Fischy